A Fresh Look at Female Archetypes

Any woman who has picked up a book about the Goddess or taken a 101 class has been taught that the three female archetypes are the Maiden, Mother, and Crone.  This idea, the Triple Goddess, is delicately pounded into our heads from the beginning of our training.  Even thought times have changed and we are living longer than our ancestors, modern traditions cling tight to this model for explaining the stages of a woman’s life.

I politely disagree on just the three and offer up an additional two phases…

Maiden

The Maiden archetype is generally depicted in white with long, flowing blond hair.  She is running through a meadow, communing with the animals, and basking in the glow of nature.  She is innocent, not aware of the ways of the world.  She is just coming into her own and at peace with herself.

How many teenagers these days are like that?

In my mind, a Maiden falls in the birth to preteen age group.  She exhibits the youthful innocence that has come to be expected of the archetype and has not yet become worn down or jaded against the expectations of society.

Warrior

I was introduced to the concept of the Warrior phase while working on my degree studies through the Family Wiccan Traditions International (which has since disbanded).  Since I always felt that there was a huge gap between the Maiden and Mother, I quickly folded the Warrior into my own life and belief system.

The Warrior represents women from their teens until somewhere in their mid-twenties.  She is on a quest to discover who she is and what she wants out of her life.  She is learning when to take a stand, fighting fiercely for something she believes in.  She is also learning when to compromise.  She may or may not be in a relationship, but understands that her needs and happiness come first.

Mother

The standard image of the Mother is a woman who is with child or one who is holding a small child in her arms.  She has long dark hair and wears red, for the blood that she has shed.  She is the nurturer, guide, and protector for those to come.

To me, the Mother does not have to actually have children.  She not only nurtures her children (and pets), but herself, her significant other (if she has one), family, friends, and her career.  She is fiercely protective of the ones she loves and guides the younger generations with a gentle, but firm hand.  She is represented by women in their late twenties until early forties.

Queen

I always felt that there was another gap between the Mother and Crone, but never knew what to call that particular phase.  In the SageWoman Magazine issue 74, entitled Visions of the Goddess: Queen, I found what I had been seeking in an article called “Why We Need the Queen.”

The Queen presides over the woman in their late forties until their late fifties to early sixties.  If she has children, they are grown and beginning their own lives.  They are wiser, still have “it,” and pretty much have life figured out.  They are living out their dreams, taking risks, and doing what they want to do when they want to.

Crone

Cloaked in a veil of darkness, the Crone breathes wisdom into the younger generations.  She has lived a long, full life and retains her blood each month.  She has done her duties and now is her time of rest.  Her light still shines, but is dimmed by experience.

With women living longer than ever and more active in their older years (my grandmother is still feisty at 87), the entire image of the crone has changed.  She still clings to her youth (especially if there are grandchildren) and serves as a Matron and respected elder of the family.  She pursues her hobbies, may still work, and keeps busy doing things she loves.  She has learned from experience and applies the wisdom she has acquired, not making the same mistakes anymore.  She is loved and celebrated by all, sought out for council, and living on her terms.

So there they are - my five female archetypes.

Now I Become Myself

Now I become myself. It’s taken Time, many years and places,

                        I have been dissolved and shaken,
                         worn other peoples faces,            

                      

Run madly, as if Time were there,
 Terribly old, crying a warning,
“hurry, you will be dead before ——”
(What? Before you reach the morning?
or before the end of the poem is clear?
Or love safe in the walled city?)



     Now to stand still, to be here,

      Feel my own weight and density…..
      Now there is time 
       and time is young,
                       

O, in this single hour I live
All of myself and do not move
I, the pursued who madly ran,





  
                   Stand still, stand still and stop the Sun!

                                            ~May Sarton~


I feel like this is the perfect poem for my life now. For so long, I've been tormented by anxiety and depression and I'm not fooling myself that those won't be constant companions on my journey. But, I love the lines  "Now I become myself. It’s taken Time, many years and places."

  

I'm forty-six years old and I sometimes stop believing I was ever a "maiden" in her twenties, excited, always running to something new, and then I was married at age twenty-three, which I shudder to think about, because at that time, I still had dreams of the perfect family. I was going to have one no matter what it took because I was denied my dreams of a fantasy childhood. I mean really, who has had one? I'd like to meet them. But from my marriage I was given the most precious gift I would ever receive . Even though I became divorced three years later I had my son. I became the "Mother." Full of abundance, a new type of sensuality I could never have seen in my twenties and yet full of sorrows being a single mother. Along with the wonders, I also gained a new anxiety for the safety of my son, that most mother's develop when they have a child. 

Whenever I imagined, my son, Alexander hurt in any way, I would be thrown into this deep, dark, dry well of fear and stay stuck until I somehow climbed out. Much like "Cassandra from Troy" I started to "run madly, as if Time were there, Terribly old, crying a warning, hurry you will be dead before...." My son and I struggled together emotionally with him projecting all his anger and sorrow from an alcoholic, unavailable and unstable father onto me. It's only lately within the last few years that I can forgive myself for not being able to provide what he so desperately needed and wanted,  for his idea of a perfect childhood. He also acknowledges that I did the best I could and he told me, I was one of the only constant things in his life and I continue to fulfill that touchstone for him.  I haven't learned to stop the sun, but I'm not burned up with fear and paralyzed that I'm eventually going to be a crone. Being a Crone will bring it's own wise and wonderful rewards. That's why it's so important to have mentors and to be a mentor to others, to remind yourself of all the blessings and lessons it took to be where you are today.

Where are you in your life? Are you running or have you finally been able to catch your breath and know that life is good?

  May Sarton one of my absolute favorite poets, so if you love poetry full of images and magic, check out her works.

And if you have any poets that you like, please let me know as I love poetry!

Blessings to you all....